Wednesday, February 10, 2010

what the?

brief. Soap? It is just not..that difficult. I'm sorry. Its not!

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Sunday, January 10, 2010



Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Sunday, December 27, 2009


I am sitting here wondering what the intellectual response to this product would be. But really, I don't care. Because this is... the best thing ever. Cheers, my friends.. Cheers to science!

Drum roll...


Now, a responsible reaction. Shouldn't scientists be curing cancer, solving the AIDs pandemic, blah blah blah. Sure, but its about time these shallow advances in what I'll call "pop- science", benefit me! What the hell am I gonna do with all these male enhancement pills, hair growth and weight- loss formula. Nothing. A world with no hang overs? Never again will we utter the all to familiar "I am never drinking again".

But Until then.. remember...
Dark liquor is a killer.

and eat something before.

Thursday, December 24, 2009

Grinchy Me... circa 2006

Monday, December 25, 2006
So it is that time of year when the biggest parental conspiracy known to man rears its ugly head. Indeed, some obese bearded man, for some unknown reason is to slip down a chimney, and grant you your hearts desire..well, your hearts desire as far as your list specifies. And all that one needs to do is feign goodness. Let's not forget to leave cookies for the likely diabetic (thats smart). And what else? why veggies for the rabid magical mammals on your roof! The leader of said fur posse whose red nose would make him a great candidate for rhinoplasty.
I digress
Christmas, although tainted by commercialism, (by tainted i mean marred irreparably) should be a time when somewhere some how you manage to genuinely smile. If this means food family and gifts, bring it on, if it means just being alone and somehow finding your peace, i endorse that as well.

Merry Christmas kids, I am abounding in love for you all.

Saturday, December 19, 2009

Fruit Cake.

Tis the season right? Wrong. Here are some things I most certainly do not want under my tree..or any where near my person.

Introducing the tackiest thing..ever.
Krystal Touch...door knob?


Colorin' books.

Friday, December 11, 2009


In this, the first edition of what will later be "safe", "salt" or "epic". I present you with the Ralph Lauren Spring Collection


These mofo's look like they just waltzed out of Hogwarts. No, thanks... I'm safe on that whole look.

Heaven Cometh

..I didn't even have to sit on Santa's lap for this one! I just pasted the entire on and embrace the revolution....

"First Gourmet Marijuana Restaurant Opens In Denver"

A medical marijuana dispensary in Denver has decided to get creative and make the business into a full-service restaurant that caters to those who need to use medicinal marijuana to ease physical ailments.

The owner of Ganja Gourmet located at 1810 South Broadway Avenue said the restaurant will "aim to help distribute medicinal marijuana to those licensed to have it and provide an atmosphere where patients can visit with one another in a safe environment."

Ganja Gourmet plans to offer lasagna, gourmet pizza, jambalaya, paella, chocolate mousse and flavored cheesecakes, among other gourmet dishes.

"It's a different buzz too. It's a more alert, more awake buzz," Medical Marijuana Chef
Evan "Budman" said.

Budman believes it will put South Broadway on the state's budding medical marijuana map.

"It will bring people from all over Colorado here," he said.

The restaurant will be decorated in a 1960s retro feel, including tie-dye attire for the employees.

Steve Horowitz, an owner of Ganja Gourmet, says the restaurant will not promote a party-like atmosphere.

"With the new laws in Colorado, medicinal marijuana is a business like any other. Dozens of legal dispensaries are everywhere. We have to set ourselves apart as a business in order to survive," Horowitz said in a prepared statement. "Just like any other restaurant, we have to work on the quality of our food and our atmosphere to make sure our customers have an enjoyable experience that makes them want to come back."

Horowitz said the restaurant will offer courtesy rides home for customers who feel they can't drive.

"I hope the launch of Ganja Gourmet will set the standard for other Colorado distributers and distributers around the nation so that those suffering from illness get the best service possible," Horowitz said.

The marijuana-laced menu is actually prepared off-premises. Building inspectors won't allow an on-site kitchen because of a fire hazard.

Some neighboring businesses it's just the latest proof several blocks of South Broadway are going to pot.

"I don't think it's good for the neighborhood," an area business owner said. "I think it's a joke that they're using the guise that it's medicinal. It just shows it's not medicinal."

Former State Rep. Don Armstrong, injured in Vietnam, says the ganja gourmet is just what he needs instead of powerful painkillers.

"This is an alternative for me. It's a great alternative, when I do this," Armstrong said. "I can function with life in me and be able to live a normal life … I'm learning on the eating part. I'm just trying this out now."

Ganja Gourmet opened on Wednesday.

Original article here.

On The Record: iThink does no endorse illegal drug use. But really if it is legal what is the difference between this mary jane slice of pizza and an Advil or Viagra? Well. the difference is one has mass distribution, backed by a billion dollar industry, is openly socially accepted and can fund a whole lot crap. And the other, makes ya kinda hungry. Is that the devil's handy work? Nay, I say! I am not going into the politics of drug laws, I am much to tired for that, all I'm saying is its about time someone had the gall to step up and embrace and integrate a product the drives this particular food market forward. Seriously, do college kids keep these sh*t burger joints, sandwich shacks, pizza delivery, and late night (ehm) confection connection eateries open because the food is so damned delicious? NO.

Besides if this "ganja" that these people are referring to is legalized nationally..uh it can be taxed. Duh, and it'd encourage competition, its the capitalist way! THE AMERICAN WAY! Coca- Cola dime bags! And we could stop filling up our prisons with the petite drug possession charges. Just sayin..its a recession.

Monday, December 7, 2009

Spread 'em joy, that is... and nothing says Merry Christmas like a gyno swabbing ya' lady bits.. jingle her bells fellas...

oh, and for our kosher counter parts...

complete with Fiddler on the Roof background music.. schmeear (hahaha)

uhm. where is the one for Kwanzaa?

Alfonso Ribiero "Wanna keep it real for tha' ladies" etc..
with Barry White in the background.


Culturally appropriate.

This commercial is a comedic gem on its own but they could have found a more endearing and less possessive phrase than "your woman". And I'm pretty sure your woman can manage..her body..without your help.

Friday, October 9, 2009

I don't like this crap!

You have got to be (excuse the vulgarity)- Fucking Kidding me...

And that Puma, is how you lose a loyal customer to her values. If i ever see this on someones iPhone, I may kick 'em in the nuts, no worries I'll use the green puma's I still own. That way their crotch will have another deep tingling feeling- sponsored by Puma.

Because my homepage (sociological images [nerd..i know]) summarized it for me...just click here

oh candace you are such an angsty feminist. Eh- SHOVE IT!!!

Monday, October 5, 2009

Saturday, September 26, 2009

Friday, September 25, 2009

Poke Your Face

I understand the need to protect public health, but this is beyond ridiculous. Actually, its frightening.

I think perhaps this is the sign of the apocalypse? Maybe only in New England. I'm safe. I hope people are rallying in the streets, because the thought of an involuntary injection is reminiscent of..i dont know.. the Tuskegee Project!

FYI: The Tuskegee Project in synopsis in two lines: 1932 Experiment the injected black men with syphilis and/or left those already with the disease untreated so that the effects of the disease on the "negro body" could be examined. Patients were left untreated, even though there were standard treatments at the time, because the test subjects were only valuable to the study once they died, and the autopsy yielded some kind of addition to science.
(Thanks Candace for this moment in black history) American history breaks my heart.

Just consider this. 5-0 kicks in ya door wavin the 4,4, and either injects with what you hope is a vaccine, but since they are already in your home can arrest you for, anything "illegal" that they see. And hm, do you think some cop really cares to take the proper medical protocol to ensure that your injection is given correctly, with a sanitary needle? Prob not, these are cops..not doctors.
 And lets think of all the diseases you can get from a tainted needle:
  1. HIV/ AIDs
  2. Hep B
  3. Malaria
  4. uh- anything that anyone else has cause its going from on blood stream to another.
  5. Conspiracy theory- heroin (get ya hooked on the D)
The other option is incarceration? Hrm. I don't want to bring up the prison industrial complex, or the attack on ethnic minorities and the poor, but just think of the implications. Sheesh. I'm done with this.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Instead of Sleeping...

This man is what happens when you never..leave Ithaca, NY.

my reaction: nonplussed

If only Mufasa were regulate.


the only thing funnier than the mass exodus as the dude filming lol.